Today I woke up feeling sorry for myself. As if I have anything to feel sorry about... I am a selfish human being after all. I was frustrated about a few things, namely that I fractured a bone in my foot and am now wearing a cast.... that my daughter, Bella screamed for two hours straight yesterday in therapy.... and that I have to do homework instead of unpack my house to find the missing bathroom trash cans I need. Long story short, I was not pleased with my life this morning.
Here's where God's gentle and refining wisdom seeped in...
I had to go dispute something with the postmaster at the post office today. I came into the office exactly as the doors opened and there were huge lines already. I huffed and puffed (secretly in my heart) and tried to maintain a positive demeanor while waiting in line like cattle in a herd. To speak with the postmaster, they sent me to the room where people get their passports made. I immediately noticed a family with five children who had been there before the office opened. As I rounded the corner I saw one of the most heart warming and heart breaking things .... a little, fragile figure. All I saw in the wheelchair was a young child, wrapped in blankets, eyes barely peering out from under the brim of a hat they had placed on her head. She was pale, thin like a skeleton, and her breathing was clearly labored. Her mother was tending to the younger children while the father knelt down and held his daughter's delicate hands in his own. He whispered sweet nothings into her ears and caressed the top of her hands as though she was a precious gem. She tried to respond as she fought to keep her eyes open and focused. There was not a doubt in my mind, this was a very sick child.
As I grumpily waited for the postmaster to arrive, I heard the father say to the clerk, "We are here to get 7 passports". The clerk asked why the family needed the passports and the father responded, "We are here for Make-a-Wish Foundation". The clerk suddenly became a bit more gentle in speech. She looked down at the child and was reminded herself, that life is a vapor. The father asked her when the passports would be ready and she told him a date that was clearly too far away. He became a bit more urgent in speech (after a whisper from his wife about their sick child) and said, "We need them expedited"... "When is the earliest we can get them".... my heart understood. My eyes filled with tears as I processed what he meant.... she didn't have much time.
While the passports were being generated, I fashioned myself near the girl feeling the urge to pray in my heart. By the looks of things, she was losing a battle with cancer or leukemia. I prayed a miracle in her sweet, 13 year old life. I prayed for strength for the parents, strength that only God provides those who are hurting so deeply in their hearts. As I prayed this, the father turned around (as though to ensure the girl did not feel left out in the process) and gently brushed her cheek with the back of his hand. In his eyes I saw tentative hope.
Friends, as I type this and am reminded how fragile life is... I want to thank God for all He has given me. A home, a family, a perfect daughter who can scream as much as she needs. Praise God for His mercy today... because today, he woke us all up. He allowed us to have breath, and life, and joys so abundant and numerous we cannot name them.
Do you know the ways in which God cares for you? Look around you....you'll be amazed. Today I pray that this family from the post office KNOWS God. In a very real way. They don't know me, they don't know the words uttered secretly in my heart, but God does. I pray he heals this girl.
I pray He constantly reminds me of His presence in my life. Yours too.